Anonymous Messages For All To Read

Work's been pretty pensive lately. It's unfortunate that I have so much time to think. To me, pensive has always had a darker meaning to it. According to thefreedictionary.com pensive could be a melancholy thoughtfulness and that pretty much nails it.

Feeling glum, looking inward, I tried to peice together what had led me to dejection.

A hole in my life... An ache in my heart... Only one thing could do such damage.

Fucking girls. Sorry ladies, it's true, you got me down right now.

So what will cure this depression? I have the answer, always had. It's not nessecarily a flirty romance or passionate fling (but I must add, either would do me well) but an internal answer. Strength only comes from inside.

So without further ado! Here is everything I've every wanted to say to certain girls! (The names have been redacted to ethnic names to protect anonyminity.)

Alba - So long ago I barely recall. One thing I must say, it was pretty shitty how you broke up with me. You shouldn't have dicked around it, but I guess getting dicked around is what happened after me.

Adedewe - You were a supreme bitch. Your sex and siren song clouded my thought until the very end. It was hard to get over you. I'm pretty sure you cheated.

Kadija - Ah Kadija, I really loved you. Sometimes you just love a person enough to know your not right for them. Sorry I don't see you anymore, I'm afraid to fall in love with you again.

Barongo - Funny how things come full circle right? I was so angry with you I wrote a song about it. I still sing this song... I wonder if you'll hear it?

Kantayeni - Listen, I was really drunk when I woke up and I may have forgotten to brush my teeth that day but that doesn't mean you can't at least say so instead of not calling me anymore!

Laini - Okay, I'm coming clean here. "I thought we were done with that" I may have said to friends but I had sex with you on numerous occasions. I enjoyed the attention but you annoy me. I kept sleeping with you because I would never call or really want to hang out and felt bad. Don't think of it as a pity fuck either. I'm a jerk and you know it.

Gerda - I see you in ShopRite... Too embarassed to talk to me? I think I was intimidated by your tits. Spectacular.

Masani - You're weird. And you rip people off. And your hair smells.

Adongo - Sorry Adongo, your not my type.

Jamala - Look what this great guy did? Passed out and blacked out you find yourself sleeping next to yours truly. You thought we fooled around. Did we? Nope. Watch your drinks Jamala.

Sabra - I could write volumes about this girl and still not say all there is to say. I miss you. I'm sorry.

Chiku - I was just lonely all those times. I think you were too. I was never that attracted to you. And you snore.

Ajia - Were you embarassed of your one-night stand? You practically woke the whole house!

Malegna - I would drop everything if you'd be mine. I think it's that sexy brain of yours. Not many seem to have that. I felt like we could really communicate if we tried. I just wish you felt the same. I'm embarassed to say so but I don't see you enough. I still think about you.

Almasi - You're awesome. Keep being awesome.

Vana - Somehow I knew you wouldn't last long.

Kifimbo - I never got to kiss you before you left. I was intimidated by your hotness. Give me another chance!

There ya go! Not a complete list but I think this post has served its purpose. Illuminating the hole most likely but the catharsis acheived. It's good to be able to laugh about these things.

On second thought... any ladies interested in a passionate fling or flirty romance?